Hello there, and welcome to Slender Nation. Before you begin posting, we require that you read our rules so that you understand what standards are required of you during your stay here. Thank you, and have a good day.

-The Slender Nation Staff



 
HomepageHomeCalendarFAQSearchMemberlistUsergroupsRegisterLog in

Trial of Leaves: Justin
TribeTwelve: Bridge to Nowhere
Dark Harvest: Log Entry #33
Joined a Slender Nation House yet? Click the colored parts of the shield on the right to see the Houses!

Share | 
 

 Slender Blog Critiques

View previous topic View next topic Go down 
Go to page : Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7  Next
AuthorMessage
Maduin
Observer


Posts : 104
Current Win Points : 67
Join date : 2011-01-03
Age : 30
Location : The darkest game arcade

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 4:25 am

Zander wrote:
Who has yet to be critiqued? *Looks around* I feel like doing one.

The World That Never Was, please?
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://worstjestever.blogspot.com
zero
Stalked


Posts : 320
Current Win Points : 115
Join date : 2010-12-25

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 6:23 am

Zander wrote:
Broeckchen wrote:
Kay wrote:
If anyone here is still looking for a blog to review I just want to point out that these four still need to be properly reviewed:

Vivere Disce
Father of Light
Vox93
A Fate Worse Than Death

These, Pantsu~<3
Delmonty already reviewed Father of Light and Vox93 a couple pages back, and Vivere Disce was covered by Slice and someone else too. I can't find a link to A Fate Worse Than Death in this thread either. So I'll review yours Shayde.

I'mma need a drink to get through all of that though.

heh, let me help you with that

fateworsethandeath.blogspot.com
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Omega
Blackout


Posts : 569
Current Win Points : 481
Join date : 2011-01-10
Age : 26

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 7:12 am

Zander wrote:
Broeckchen wrote:
Kay wrote:
If anyone here is still looking for a blog to review I just want to point out that these four still need to be properly reviewed:

Vivere Disce
Father of Light
Vox93
A Fate Worse Than Death

These, Pantsu~<3
Delmonty already reviewed Father of Light and Vox93 a couple pages back, and Vivere Disce was covered by Slice and someone else too. I can't find a link to A Fate Worse Than Death in this thread either. So I'll review yours Shayde.

I'mma need a drink to get through all of that though.

Actually, Delmonty reviewed Smiting the Gods and then said that she hadn't yet read Father of Light or Vox93, so reviews on those would wait until later.

Just Saiyan.
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://slenderia.blogspot.com/
Broeckchen
Observer


Posts : 179
Current Win Points : 176
Join date : 2011-01-18
Age : 27
Location : Germany

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 8:24 am

Please don't forget the RRRUUUURRRUUU though, guys. Give someone else a critique and you will be critiqued.
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://broeckchen.deviantart.com
Maduin
Observer


Posts : 104
Current Win Points : 67
Join date : 2011-01-03
Age : 30
Location : The darkest game arcade

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 8:28 am

Broeckchen wrote:
Please don't forget the RRRUUUURRRUUU though, guys. Give someone else a critique and you will be critiqued.

Okay, which ones are requested but not yet done?
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://worstjestever.blogspot.com
Thage the Minithulu
Observer


Posts : 151
Current Win Points : 84
Join date : 2011-01-10
Age : 28
Location : Elsewhere~

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 10:12 am

Putting all three of mine up there. PIFTO, Para N-S-N, and Have You Seen Me?. I'll think of something to review--for now, though, let 'er rip! Riff 'em, point out every last flaw. FEED ME.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
SliceandDice
Anxious


Posts : 77
Current Win Points : 18
Join date : 2011-04-07

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 11:07 am

PNSN- WHY YOU DELETE. I WANTED TO READ THAT GRAAAAAAAAAAH

PIFTO- I fucking loved the first half of your blog. You went from making comments to 60 ravenous followers and a blog dedicated to interpreting you overnight. That's some shit! But, I think (who knows if this is true you cancelled it) the path it was going on wasn't as good as the way it was at first. The cryptic metaphors? RIGHTEOUS AS SHIT. Crossing over with Reach and Ava as intensely as you did, to me was a mistake. But again this is like critiquing an unfinished painting. I WAS SO UPSET WHEN YOU CANCELLED THIS BLOG.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Thage the Minithulu
Observer


Posts : 151
Current Win Points : 84
Join date : 2011-01-10
Age : 28
Location : Elsewhere~

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 11:22 am

PNSN- Trust me, it managed to make H(a)unting look complex by comparison. :\ XD

PIFTO- :3 Thanks for the review, homes.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Zander
Survivor


Posts : 1570
Current Win Points : 640
Join date : 2010-12-11
Age : 24
Location : Gone

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 1:21 pm

Here's my review of: http://perhapshesleeps.blogspot.com/



Just on the first post, I gotta say that I don't like the labels at the bottom of it. Not a bad way to start out though, making a blog about reviewing books. Though I was expecting more drawn out reviews of the books as well, and to me you jumped the gun on bringing in Slendy stuff. It might've been better had you pulled the character into the books of fantasy more at first before he delved into Der Großmann, and I did like how you kept calling him that. From Slendy stuff onward, you did a pretty good job. I got a very similar vibe to Just Another Fool of which I assume was a high inspiration with the Norse God references and Yggdrasil, and was interested to see every new page flipped and every new picture(for the record, I like JAF for that book and the Yggdrasil thing, but it's not one of my favorites). You made me say "The fuck?" aloud when I read some of the posts, so kudos to you.



As I got towards the middle of the blog, it felt more surreal and less believable for me. The cult thing was an interesting turn of events, but the Aftermath post reminded me too much of some action flick thing and just seemed all sorts of ridiculous. This was slightly redeemed by the Omega post that I knew was coming, and I couldn't help but grin.

When the end came, I was just thoroughly confused. I feel as if I understand it, but I don't at the same time. Maybe it just went over my head with some of John's posts. Nevertheless, an enjoyable yet slightly confusing read.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Maduin
Observer


Posts : 104
Current Win Points : 67
Join date : 2011-01-03
Age : 30
Location : The darkest game arcade

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 1:50 pm

Para-not-so-normal:
Dearie, it was one of the most inconsistent things when it comes to quality - it shifted eagerly between amazing and horrible. Fizzy was wonderfully fleshed out and for all the horribly unbelievable badassery she supposedly performed she was actually believable personality-wise. Her heroic sacrifice was a wonderful touch.
As for her Back-from-the-dead episode, well, I didn't like it being a back-from-the-dead episode because I'm just sick of those, but it was more of wonderfully written Fizzbomb with badassery that was much more believable. All in all, could have been better, but a fine job it was.
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://worstjestever.blogspot.com
Thage the Minithulu
Observer


Posts : 151
Current Win Points : 84
Join date : 2011-01-10
Age : 28
Location : Elsewhere~

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 1:53 pm

Maduin wrote:
Para-not-so-normal:
Dearie, it was one of the most inconsistent things when it comes to quality - it shifted eagerly between amazing and horrible. Fizzy was wonderfully fleshed out and for all the horribly unbelievable badassery she supposedly performed she was actually believable personality-wise. Her heroic sacrifice was a wonderful touch.
As for her Back-from-the-dead episode, well, I didn't like it being a back-from-the-dead episode because I'm just sick of those, but it was more of wonderfully written Fizzbomb with badassery that was much more believable. All in all, could have been better, but a fine job it was.
Yyyyyeah, I had intended to reveal the badassery as a ton of hogwash and hallucinations a LOT earlier. :\ Fucking November, how did you work.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Broeckchen
Observer


Posts : 179
Current Win Points : 176
Join date : 2011-01-18
Age : 27
Location : Germany

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 2:00 pm

@Maduin: I posted a list on the last page...

Zander wrote:
Here's my review of: http://perhapshesleeps.blogspot.com/



Though I was expecting more drawn out reviews of the books as well, and to me you jumped the gun on bringing in Slendy stuff. It might've been better had you pulled the character into the books of fantasy more at first before he delved into Der Großmann, and I did like how you kept calling him that. From Slendy stuff onward, you did a pretty good job. I got a very similar vibe to Just Another Fool of which I assume was a high inspiration with the Norse God references and Yggdrasil, and was interested to see every new page flipped and every new picture(for the record, I like JAF for that book and the Yggdrasil thing, but it's not one of my favorites).

Zander wrote:
before he delved into Der Großmann, and I did like how you kept calling him that.

Zander wrote:
Der Großmann

Zander wrote:
Der Großmann

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-!!!!!

I didn't read the whole blog yet (started though, but it might take a while...) but I gathered that
Spoiler:
 
and really should give the impression to be him.
Again, when written like that, the whole word just becomes narmy for everyone who really knows German. It's as if you'd call him Slendyman in English. Looks funny? Right. Of course,
Spoiler:
 
but I doubt that was what you intendend. Contrarily to Zander, I will cringe in pain everytime you'll say this term... :<

Furthermore, just as a reminder:
Spoiler:
 

That said, I'm still going to read your blog and critique it. Please don't be sad if I might rant a lot during reading it though if you used a lot of German...
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://broeckchen.deviantart.com
Shayde
Watched


Posts : 254
Current Win Points : 133
Join date : 2010-12-17

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Fri May 06, 2011 9:08 pm

Zander wrote:
Here's my review of: http://perhapshesleeps.blogspot.com/



Just on the first post, I gotta say that I don't like the labels at the bottom of it. Not a bad way to start out though, making a blog about reviewing books. Though I was expecting more drawn out reviews of the books as well, and to me you jumped the gun on bringing in Slendy stuff. It might've been better had you pulled the character into the books of fantasy more at first before he delved into Der Großmann, and I did like how you kept calling him that. From Slendy stuff onward, you did a pretty good job. I got a very similar vibe to Just Another Fool of which I assume was a high inspiration with the Norse God references and Yggdrasil, and was interested to see every new page flipped and every new picture(for the record, I like JAF for that book and the Yggdrasil thing, but it's not one of my favorites). You made me say "The fuck?" aloud when I read some of the posts, so kudos to you.



As I got towards the middle of the blog, it felt more surreal and less believable for me. The cult thing was an interesting turn of events, but the Aftermath post reminded me too much of some action flick thing and just seemed all sorts of ridiculous. This was slightly redeemed by the Omega post that I knew was coming, and I couldn't help but grin.

When the end came, I was just thoroughly confused. I feel as if I understand it, but I don't at the same time. Maybe it just went over my head with some of John's posts. Nevertheless, an enjoyable yet slightly confusing read.

Yeah, I kinda regret not drawing it out a bit more at the start with the book stuff, and I kinda jumped in a bit too soon. I mainly used the labels for hiding stuff that wasn't important to the story, but for those who wanted to seek it out. When I started, I hadn't actually read JAF properly. I had read a summery or two of it, and the first few posts, which gave me the idea of using a notebook and pictures. I never read I properly until around the EYE post, at which point I realised just how close it was, and.

The middle was basiclly me getting bored. If I'd had any sense at the time, I would have ended it after
Spoiler:
 
But I didn't, and seeing as no one solved the Keyed Ceaser Cypher (the key was YGGDRASIL), I couldn't go onto my other story I'd thought of. So instead I decided to follow the Liesmith. Most of those posts where just to keep me interested, and to get me to the big revelation and end. I used Nazis! Gunfights! Quests! Unbelievable Injuries! Mostly I was just rambling by that stage.

The end, I'll admit, is just broken. Even though there's only a post to go, I kinda screwed it a little, taking it into a post-modern, surrealist place, where even I get a little confused as to what I was actually aiming for. Most of it from the middle onwards was just me trying to push people suspension of disbelief, and my own, but creating a strange mess instead.

Thanks for the critique Very Happy

Broeckchen wrote:

Zander wrote:
Der Großmann

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-!!!!!

I didn't read the whole blog yet (started though, but it might take a while...) but I gathered that
Spoiler:
 
and really should give the impression to be him.
Again, when written like that, the whole word just becomes narmy for everyone who really knows German. It's as if you'd call him Slendyman in English. Looks funny? Right. Of course,
Spoiler:
 
but I doubt that was what you intendend. Contrarily to Zander, I will cringe in pain everytime you'll say this term... :<

Furthermore, just as a reminder:
Spoiler:
 

That said, I'm still going to read your blog and critique it. Please don't be sad if I might rant a lot during reading it though if you used a lot of German...

Don't worry about 'Der Großmann' showing up too many times...okay maybe it shows up a bit more then a few, but I don't really know any German, bar a few words, so it was a mistake (though one I probably should have figured out). And actually
Spoiler:
 
And I used a lot more French then German, so you should be fine there...well I hope so Razz

As for the god thing, I know that the Norse gods are Scandinavian in origin and anything that linked them to Germany was probably a slight mistake on my part. I tried to base The Liesmith more off Loki from "American Gods" by Neil Gaiman, and less off the one of myth.There was a reason for that but not a very good one in the fact that
Spoiler:
 

Anyway keep reading. I can't wait for your full critique Smile

(And don't hold back. If it's bad, say so. Anything to help make my writing better Very Happy)
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Michenab
Untainted


Posts : 35
Current Win Points : 2
Join date : 2011-04-02
Location : TX

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Sat May 07, 2011 1:09 am

Maduin wrote:
Broeckchen wrote:
Please don't forget the RRRUUUURRRUUU though, guys. Give someone else a critique and you will be critiqued.

Okay, which ones are requested but not yet done?

http://vox93.blogspot.com/
http://michenab-fatheroflight.blogspot.com/

These two have not been done yet.
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://michenab-fatheroflight.blogspot.com/
Omega
Blackout


Posts : 569
Current Win Points : 481
Join date : 2011-01-10
Age : 26

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Sat May 07, 2011 7:58 am

Michenab wrote:
Maduin wrote:
Broeckchen wrote:
Please don't forget the RRRUUUURRRUUU though, guys. Give someone else a critique and you will be critiqued.

Okay, which ones are requested but not yet done?

http://vox93.blogspot.com/
http://michenab-fatheroflight.blogspot.com/

These two have not been done yet.

I'm getting the impression that there is some kind of prejudice directed towards those two. Like a conspiracy going, "Errbody! Don't review them! Maybe it'll make them go away! Wink
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://slenderia.blogspot.com/
zero
Stalked


Posts : 320
Current Win Points : 115
Join date : 2010-12-25

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Sat May 07, 2011 9:18 am

all I can say about Vox 93, is that I decided I'd peek into it, saw the phrase 'sex magic' and closed the window. I doubt the entire blog is like that, nor in detail, I just didn't want to go on any further atm.

maybe i'll read father of light
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Omega
Blackout


Posts : 569
Current Win Points : 481
Join date : 2011-01-10
Age : 26

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Sat May 07, 2011 11:49 am

zero wrote:
all I can say about Vox 93, is that I decided I'd peek into it, saw the phrase 'sex magic' and closed the window. I doubt the entire blog is like that, nor in detail, I just didn't want to go on any further atm.

maybe i'll read father of light

Oh, that's just Setoth's oddly roundabout way of saying he's picked up a girlfriend. Laughing

I know the post you're talking about, and it was supposed to be mostly humorous. Over half of the content is thinly veiled innuendos directed towards Arkady and Javert.
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://slenderia.blogspot.com/
SliceandDice
Anxious


Posts : 77
Current Win Points : 18
Join date : 2011-04-07

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Sat May 07, 2011 1:28 pm

Okay.

Father of Light was hard to read. I can't really place why, but it was kind of dull, even up into the more recent posts, though it has been picking up steam.

I woudl like to say though that you should leave the magick stuff to Vox. I dunno why, it just feels out of place here.

As for Vox:

Once you started getting slendery, It got a lot better and easier to read. still sometimes I have a hard time at getting through your posts, though I'd be pressed to say why.

Maybe its just that I was reading your posts in tandem, reading FoL -> Vox93 -> StG back to FoL. Who knows.
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Seann
Anxious


Posts : 61
Current Win Points : 31
Join date : 2011-03-11

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Wed May 11, 2011 11:48 am

I would put Eccentrically Bored and Hidden in the Trees up for review, but I'd feel like a dick doing that without reviewing something else. Any suggestions on which blog(s) I should review?
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Broeckchen
Observer


Posts : 179
Current Win Points : 176
Join date : 2011-01-18
Age : 27
Location : Germany

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Wed May 11, 2011 12:07 pm

Seann wrote:
I would put Eccentrically Bored and Hidden in the Trees up for review, but I'd feel like a dick doing that without reviewing something else. Any suggestions on which blog(s) I should review?

Any, really. Vox93 and Father of Light could still use a more elaborate review though, I guess.
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://broeckchen.deviantart.com
Omega
Blackout


Posts : 569
Current Win Points : 481
Join date : 2011-01-10
Age : 26

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Wed May 11, 2011 12:22 pm

Seann wrote:
I would put Eccentrically Bored and Hidden in the Trees up for review, but I'd feel like a dick doing that without reviewing something else. Any suggestions on which blog(s) I should review?

REVIEW ALL OF THEM. LIKE A BOSS.
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://slenderia.blogspot.com/
Seann
Anxious


Posts : 61
Current Win Points : 31
Join date : 2011-03-11

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Wed May 11, 2011 1:14 pm

Very well:

Vox 93 Review:

The first thing Setoth does is

Discuss the the occult!
(Like a boss!)
Listen to music!
(Like a boss!)
Go to a concert!
(Like a boss!)
Plug his friend's blog!
(Like a boss!)
Discuss Death Black Metal!
(Like a boss!)
Discuss Slender Man!
(Like a boss!)
Correct Omega!
(Like a boss!)
Summon Slendy!
(Like a boss!)
Ally with Arkady!
(Like a boss!)
Make some symbols!
(Like a boss!)
Do some experiments!
(Like a boss!)

*ahem* Anyway, serious review time:

Vox 93 is a mixed bag. When it's good, it's really good, but all the other times are a bit of a killjoy. Setoth has a tendency to ramble, and while the first half of the blog did a great job of establishing his character, it also reminded me of why I don't read normal blogs-- too little happening. It wasn't long before I found myself just skimming through the entries. Occasionally, something would catch my interest and I'd find myself reading an entire entry (the one about the Ars Goetia was one of these), but for the most part I found myself wondering when Slendy would show up and start going through his usual routine.

Admittedly, how Slendy finally showed up was amusing, and it was a pretty well-done instance of "Oh, I heard of Slender Man but I don't believe he'sOHMYGODTHEREHEISAAAAAAAH!". Once again proving that it is, in fact, possible to do cliches in interesting ways.

I'm still not done reading through it (I'm on "The Lazarus Effect" right now) so my opinion my change, but right now it's an interesting blog with an unfortunate tendency to read like a textbook at times.


Last edited by Seann on Fri May 20, 2011 6:35 am; edited 1 time in total
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Michenab
Untainted


Posts : 35
Current Win Points : 2
Join date : 2011-04-02
Location : TX

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Thu May 12, 2011 2:01 am

But that's why we love dear old Setoth. Everyone needs a rambler. <3 /obviousbias
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://michenab-fatheroflight.blogspot.com/
Broeckchen
Observer


Posts : 179
Current Win Points : 176
Join date : 2011-01-18
Age : 27
Location : Germany

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Thu May 12, 2011 6:40 am

Michenab wrote:
But that's why we love dear old Setoth. Everyone needs a rambler. <3 /obviousbias

*smirk* Critique is not to be used to justify yourself against it, but to accept it. (Or not...)
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://broeckchen.deviantart.com
Omega
Blackout


Posts : 569
Current Win Points : 481
Join date : 2011-01-10
Age : 26

PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Thu May 12, 2011 7:35 am

Broeckchen wrote:
Michenab wrote:
But that's why we love dear old Setoth. Everyone needs a rambler. <3 /obviousbias

*smirk* Critique is not to be used to justify yourself against it, but to accept it. (Or not...)

He's the author of Father of Light, not Vox.

Besides, who doesn't love a rambler? Right?
(Actually, tbh that'd be my primary complaint against Vox as well)
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://slenderia.blogspot.com/
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: Slender Blog Critiques   Today at 4:27 pm

Back to top Go down
 
Slender Blog Critiques
View previous topic View next topic Back to top 
Page 5 of 7Go to page : Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7  Next

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
 :: Slender Man Series :: Blog Trailheads-
Jump to: