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 Forever My Sarah

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TripleDPie
DFW
SliceandDice
Lero
Meri
9 posters
AuthorMessage
Meri
Untainted
Meri


Posts : 8
Current Win Points : 2
Join date : 2011-05-10
Location : UK

Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah EmptyMon May 23, 2011 7:07 pm

*beats off stage fright with a halberd*


This is Clair's blog, she's a 16 year old stalker perfectly well adjusted and normal girl who has just met the love of her life, Sarah, a 20-something college student. They have never spoken are crazy about each other and are working toward moving in together.

Enjoy.

http://forevermysarah.blogspot.com/



Criticism appreciated.


Last edited by Meri on Tue May 24, 2011 6:40 am; edited 1 time in total
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Lero
Anxious



Posts : 96
Current Win Points : 12
Join date : 2011-05-02
Age : 33
Location : Home

Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Re: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah EmptyMon May 23, 2011 10:32 pm

Confusing. But that's fine, because I like confusing things, as long as they are supposed to be confusing. I will probably read this.
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SliceandDice
Anxious
SliceandDice


Posts : 77
Current Win Points : 18
Join date : 2011-04-07

Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Re: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah EmptyMon May 23, 2011 11:29 pm

This is great!

But I think you might be moving too fast. I want more about Sarah, and much more about our lovely protagonist!
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DFW
Observer
DFW


Posts : 136
Current Win Points : 67
Join date : 2011-05-03
Age : 33
Location : North Carolina

Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Re: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah EmptyTue May 24, 2011 10:16 am

most adorable stalker ever?

..I think so
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TripleDPie
Observer
TripleDPie


Posts : 170
Current Win Points : 49
Join date : 2011-01-04
Age : 31

Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Re: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah EmptyTue May 24, 2011 12:19 pm

"I THINK SHE HAS A STALKER!"

That was a great line. The blog jumps around a bit and is confusing, but it is funny and i plan on reading more to see where it goes.
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PARADOX intent
Watched
PARADOX intent


Posts : 263
Current Win Points : 56
Join date : 2011-01-28
Age : 33
Location : Sacramento, California

Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Re: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah EmptyTue May 24, 2011 12:56 pm

...does she have Multiple Personality Disorder? That's what it sounds like to me.

I do like this blog though. <3
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http://myloverskitten.deviantart.com
Leviathan
Untainted
Leviathan


Posts : 5
Current Win Points : 0
Join date : 2011-05-24
Age : 29
Location : Never ever land

Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Re: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah EmptyTue May 24, 2011 1:07 pm

Very cute, yet ever so creepy. I love it. Don't try to rush it though. Take your time and develop your character(s).
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Sleepy-S
Untainted
Sleepy-S


Posts : 8
Current Win Points : 0
Join date : 2011-05-21

Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Re: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah EmptyThu May 26, 2011 3:12 pm

It's good, has potential, but you're rushing it. Try to take it slow, develop the characters, make posts a bit longer. Either way, a stalker who is the protagonist is oddly cute XD
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BlackWolf
Watched
BlackWolf


Posts : 279
Current Win Points : 99
Join date : 2010-12-19
Age : 36
Location : Somewhere

Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Re: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah EmptyThu May 26, 2011 6:58 pm

Is Slendy helping the stalker girl Clair? It's got potential.
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Forever My Sarah Empty
PostSubject: Re: Forever My Sarah   Forever My Sarah Empty

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Forever My Sarah
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